I started a blog back in 2006 called “Must Stop Eating” (before Chocolate & Whine and before Stephanie Harsh and before The Vamp Tramp and holy shit can’t I ever just stick?!) and I chronicled really mundane things like what I ate and whether I pooped or not (serious) and I often ended sentences with “yay!” The truth is, back then I had legit reasons or ending my sentences with “yay!” because I was in the process of losing upwards of 50 freaking pounds. “Yay!” indeed.
I kept the weight off for a while and then I got divorced and my entire life changed. Including my eating habits. And I started to gain weight. But I kept telling myself I could lose it again any time I wanted. I knew how. I was a pro. An expert. A little weight didn’t scare me! And I continued to tell myself that until I had gained ALL THE WEIGHT BACK AND THEN SOME.
That was five years ago and I’ve been struggling ever since.
Several months ago, I started reading those old blog entries. I was so young back then, so naive and so optimistic. And while I can’t help but cringe a little and roll my eyes at some (most) of those old, silly posts, there’s something so inspiring about them, something that makes me feel like I really could do it again.
Even now, right now, just talking about them… I feel motivated.
They’re the reason I came back to “Must Stop Eating” and the reason I started blogging again. Because, let’s face facts, I really MUST STOP EATING. Getting back into a routine that once proved successful can’t hurt, right? That was my intention 6 months ago, but supposedly better late than never. (I’m not sure I agree with that statement; no one likes people who are late.)
I promise not to talk about poop this time. No, I take that back. I might talk about poop.